Sassy Fashion: What not to wear. Seriously.

You guys. Have you heard of Zulily? If not, you need to download this free app IMMEDIATELY.

Seriously. Do it now. We will wait.

You buy clothes, housewares, shoes…for the whole family. With one caveat…YA gots ta snatch that shit up quick cuz it’ll sell out! Okay, two caveats…no take backsies, so you better be damn sure you look at the size charts and measure and check and double check before you click that fucking purchase button.

Zulily has brought a lot of joy to my life. It’s also brought disappointment, bewilderment, shock and awe and pleeennnnnttttyyyyy of WHAT THE FUCK moments.

Let me explain in a series of pictures. I present to you, my…
Zulily WTF Moments of Today, January 30, 2015:

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I know, you guys…I know.

And the only thing that could horrify me more than this?

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This:

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And almost daily, I see something that highlights various nether regions of the female anatomy. As evidenced here, in an abstract manner.

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Another couple inches lower and we would be almost exactly portraying where this lovely woman’s vagina is located and by the looks of things…it might be spiky. ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK!
And if you want to know what a uterus looks like on clothing that is defined as, “Boho Chic with a Tribal Flare” feast your eyes on this one:

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Look, I know I’m not the most fashion forward person walking the planet. Not. Even. Close. But even I can see when something is so motherfucking ridiculous that it’s begging to be made fun of.

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3 thoughts on “Sassy Fashion: What not to wear. Seriously.

  1. markbialczak says:

    Graphics department and fabric cutters in cahoots on those, what shall we call them, women’s smock/dress mash-ups, Sassy. And the shoes are just plain wrong. Thanks for the Friiday no-they-didn’t. Go Seahawks.

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