Verizon Customer Service – and also my husband is probably a Saint or something…

Let me begin by saying that I knew that I really had something special when I stumbled into my husband the first time…and this? This is exactly why we’ve had a successful marriage for almost 21 years…(this is an actual chat session my husband had with Verizon Customer Support just last night…I couldn’t figure out why he was laughing so hard when he was just simply trying to order our daughter her first cell phone…)

Please hold for a Verizon Wireless sales representative to assist you with your order. Thank you for your patience.
You are now chatting with ‘Miceala’
Nathaniel: Hi, I would like to add another line for my daughter. We would like the LG Cosmos 2. Can I add an additional line for $10/month?
Miceala: Hello. Thank you for visiting our chat service. May I help you with your order today?
Nate: Hi, I would like to add another line for my daughter. We would like the LG Cosmos 2. Can I add an additional line for $10/month?
Nate: If not, how much would it be to add?
Miceala: Yes I would love to assist you with your order today!
Nate: Yes, it’s only $10 per month?
Miceala: Are you ready to begin your order at this time?
Nate: I’m ready for you to answer my question.
Nate: Are you still there?
Nate: Hello?
Nate: Miceala, are you okay?
Miceala: Yes i am here.
Nate: oh, thank god!
Nate: I would like to add another line for my daughter. We would like the LG Cosmos 2. Can I add an additional line for $10/month?
Miceala: Yes you would be able to add this line for $10 a month.
Nate: Great, let’s do it
Nate: Can you confirm what my total per month charge will be?
Nate: I must have a bad internet connection
Nate: Are you there?
Miceala: What I can do is walk you through the order and you would be able to see your pricing options. Are you ready to begin?
Nate: Yes I am
Nate: Right now, I pay about $160 / month
Nate: So, I’m guessing my total bill will go to about $170 / month
Nate: $160 + $10 = $170
Nate: Does that sound about right?
Nate: My internet connection must have gone out again.
Miceala: Yes that is correct. Are you ready to begin?
Nate: Yes, I am ready to begin.
Nate: I want the exact same service I have right now
Nate: with the LG Cosmos 2 added to it
Nate: For a total of Five Phones
Nate: For about $170 / month
Nate: Let’s do it!
Nate: Are you ready to begin?
Nate: I think somethings wrong with my internet.
Nate: I would like to add another line for my daughter. We would like the LG Cosmos 2.
Nate: Any information I can provide to help the process along?
Nate: My internet connection must have gone out again.
Nate: Are you ready to begin?
Miceala: Yes I am here.
Miceala: Are you logged into your account?
Nate: Oh good. So let’s do it
Nate: yep
Nate: looking at the LG cosmos 2
Nate: Do you have my account up?
Nate: I think somethings wrong with my internet.
Miceala: I will be more than happy to walk you through your order.
Miceala: Are you ready to begin?
Nate: Yes, let’s do this!!!
Nate: Please add an LG Cosmos 2 to my plan.
Nate: I think somethings wrong with my internet.
Nate: Are you there?
Miceala: Yes I am here. Although I am unable to place the order for you, I can walk you through the order process.
Miceala: Have you added your phones to your cart?
Nate: Okay, I have added it to my cart
Nate: And, my plan cost went from $128 to $159 per month
Nate: That is OVER $30
Miceala: Which plan did you select?
Nate: What do i do to alleviate THAT?!
Nate: Messaging is at Unlimited
Nate: which, I already have unlimited for my whole family
Nate: data is at 700 minutes
Nate: I mean, talk is at 700 minutes
Nate: I think i was at 800 minutes before wasn’t I?
Miceala: Which plan did you select?
Nate: 700 minutes / unlimited texting
Nate: which, I believe is LESS than what I had before
Nate: It says “Nationwide Talk & Text
Nate: “
Nate: On the very top it says “Nationwide Family SharePlan”
Nate: Only one of our five phones is a smart phone
Miceala: Which plan did you select?
Nate: 700 minutes / unlimited texting
Nate: which, I believe is LESS than what I had before
Nate: It says “Nationwide Talk & Text”
Nate: On the very top it says “Nationwide Family SharePlan”
Nate: Only one of our five phones is a smart phone
Nate: I just want to add a single line for $10/month
Nate: I was told I could do that
Nate: I think somethings wrong with my internet.
Nate: Hey, does your end of this conversation tell you how long we’ve been chatting?
Nate: My end doesn’t
Nate: But it feels like a long time
Miceala: What page are you on?
Nate: https://www.verizonwireless.com/b2c/accountholder/estore/addaline?execution=e1s4
Nate: it’s the NATIONWIDE FAMILY SHAREPLAN page
Nate: maybe e1s4 isn’t the correct execution number?
Miceala: Have you added your plan to your cart?
Nate: No I haven’t. And the reason why is because it added $30 to my plan
Nate: instead of $10 to my plan
Nate: I don’t want to add $30 to my plan when all I want to do is add a phone for my eleven year old daughter
Nate: not a smart phone
Nate: just a simple little phone
Nate: I think something is wrong with my internet connection
Nate: For $30 a month, I should be able to add a smart phone
Nate: but, she doesn’t NEED a smart phone
Nate: she’s only eleven
Nate: I don’t even have a smart phone
Nate: Are you still there?
Nate: I think something is wrong with my internet connection
Nate: I think something is wrong with my internet connection
Miceala: At least a 2GB data package for $30 a month is required.
Miceala: Are you ready to continue?
Nate: What happened to $10 more per month?
Nate: She doesn’t NEED a 2GB data plan
Nate: she needs a 0GB data plan
Nate: It is not a smart phone
Nate: it is a basic phone
Nate: I think something is wrong with my internet connection
Nate: I think something is wrong with my internet connection
Nate: Are you still there?
Miceala: Would you like to contact customer care to further assist you with your options?
Nate: I thought you were customer care
Nate: I think something is wrong with my internet connection
Nate: Okay, please transfer me to Customer Care
Miceala: The number to customer care is 1-800-922-0204.
Miceala: Do you have any additional questions for me today?
Nate: Yes I do
Miceala: Yes?
Nate: Are you an idiot? Or do you just get paid so little that you don’t give a fuck?
Miceala: I would appreciate it if you did not use that language. If you continue to do so, this chat will need to be terminated.
Nate: Sorry, typo
Miceala: Do you have any additional questions for me today?
Miceala: Hi, I’m just checking in, how is everything going?
Nate: Great.
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3 thoughts on “Verizon Customer Service – and also my husband is probably a Saint or something…

  1. Man that is truly horrible. I’d have to say it was someone’s last day on the job.

  2. sassypanties says:

    Reblogged this on sassypanties and commented:

    I just really think you need to read this again.

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